40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With The King Day 38 

Dear Reader, 

I write to you out of reflection from this week gone by, filled with both blessing and burden. It appears to me that life is in fact a balancing act, as they say. The blessings pour in and the provision stands evident and yet at the same time there are hard things which remind us that our crosses still feel heavy even as our hearts can feel the freedom Christ has brought to them. With every prayer I’ve prayed over these last 38 days, I have indeed seen God move. His movement has not always been in the direction I had hoped, but it has always been for good. But Good doesn’t mean easy, and I am learning that is the way of Grace filled things. They are often heavy and yet at the same time miraculous. What have been your blessings and burdens this past week? What has God shown you that you must pick up and what has He asked you to set down? With each day I’ve prayed I’ve begun to see God more clearly. He has shown up in my questioning. He has been present in my uncertainty. He has led me to seek hard things and has challenged me to face those things with Grace. Hard weeks also harbor hard fought blessings. There is blessing even in your burdens. And even as we ask and continue to see blessing after blessing, as long as we are in this world we will experience the hard effects of the burden of brokenness alongside those blessings. Jesus never promised this world would be easy, but He promised that what He fought for was worth it. He promises we never go alone. He promises that we are heard by our Father because of Him. And all of this is Grace. All of this gives Hope. And all He does for us breathes Life into these wearied bones and these tired souls. He is the one thing needed, and that is why I bow my head and fold my hands and always always look to find His blessing in the burdens. Because He stands for me and He stands for you and His love will move all our mountains and His heart will always beat with Hope for us. And this is Grace, that while we were still in our sins Christ died for us, and while we are still living in this broken world He lives for us too. Your prayers are heard by a Living Savior and a real God.

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With The King Days 36 & 37 

Dear Reader, 

Yesterday, I prayed hard for a really specific situation that was taking place. I was certain that if I had enough confidence that God would answer, and that He would answer in the way I had hoped. I was sure that what I was praying for would happen, even though it made absolutely no sense and was so completely unlikely. Yet, I could feel it in my bones, that this time God was going to come through in a miraculous way. Instead, what I so desperately wanted didn’t happen. I felt foolish. Like all my faith had really just been an inflated self ego and that because I dared to hope, God had to bend. I believe God is Good. His word says that if we ask Him in faith, we shall receive. But perhaps this generation, and myself, has misunderstood His sentiment here. Today, we ask for things and we expect an immediate response, not only from God but from technology and other people in our lives. We can’t let a day go by without responding to that Facebook notification or without posting an update on Instagram, and because that is how we are wired, we expect God to react in accordance to what we are used to. But His ways aren’t our ways, and His thoughts aren’t our thoughts. That doesn’t mean that His ways or thoughts work against us. Instead, they work so deeply because of His love for us that what He freely gives will take the time that it so desperately deserves in order to be done right. He doesn’t rush production to meet our deadlines. He doesn’t skip out on writing a chapter in order to hurry up and tell us how something will end. No. On this earth we are time bound beings, and the creator of time itself won’t work against the beautiful way He has created us and has designed our stories. Our testimonies depend on the timing of God, and the way He weaves that time holds all the Grace. We can pray for specific things or specific moments, but God works for specific purpose. That purpose is that we would see, and know, and understand His love for us and His power in our lives better. Keep praying. But also keep surrendering to Him. Keep surrendering time to Him. In earnest prayer we approach His throne and at just the right time He makes His Glory known to us.

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With The King Days 32 & 33

Dear Reader, 

I wandered into these 40 Days of Prayer hoping to experience a miracle. We are in the waiting stages of adoption and I had secretly hoped God would show up within these 40 days in a mighty way. That maybe by the end I would have a testimony of how God finally built our family, or something along those lines. To be honest these 40 days have been rough. That’s not to say that God has not shown up. I can feel Him working in reverse on my heart, the ways I thought He would work being turned inside out. He has used the small moments to remind me He is listening, and the absence of the physical presence of the desires of my heart have held me in captivation of His every word, knowing only He can provide what I need. He is speaking to me in many ways, though I admit not specifically about what I had hoped He would. So how do you keep praying when it feels like what you want is at the mercy of your God? You pray for what you need, moment by moment, hour by hour, day by day. Until all those prayerful moments amount to years and all those years amount to a living testimony in which you can proclaim, God has provided. We live in a world of want, but Jesus came to supply all our needs. I hang on to the hope that God hears our most desperate prayers, like those of Hannah as she prayed for her child. He knows what we want, but He wants to give us what we need because He can see how everything intertwines and how every prayer will play out into eternity. In a world of instant gratification, we must come to understand the eternity of our God. What if all of our Bible heroes had every one of their prayers instantly answered? How different would things have turned out? What if God had let Moses give up right when He was called to from the burning bush? What if Mary hadn’t said “Lord, be it as you say” to carrying the Savior of the world? What if Abraham was granted Issac immediately? Would we have understood how serious God is or how He loves us throughout time? We would have missed out on all of their testimonies. So tonight I pray for peace to surrender. Picking up a cross looks nothing like getting all I ever wanted. But the weight of Christ’s glory makes it beautiful.

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

How to Love: Grace When We Don’t Understand 

Dear Reader, 

We love butterflies specifically for their many colors, and yet when it comes to the many beautiful colors of people we find barriers. We see “difference” as something to fear, instead of to praise God for. We see it with many things. We see the harsh criticisms across denominational lines of what we as Christians “should” believe, but the truth there should be simple. As Christians we “should” believe in the Bible as sole truth. However, ask Christians from different denominations and they will explain that truth differently. We can’t agree, even on something as simple as what is truth. If we elevate this to the color of the people in this world, we find the same holds true. Everyone believes the answer is simple, to love. But it would appear that what love looks like is understood differently by many. My husband and I are hoping to adopt our first child, and friends, I have no idea what race our baby will be. But I want them to know they are loved by us fully. I fear for how they may perceive “love” in this world. The “truth” spoken “in love” by this world is often not truth at all, but hatred dressed up in sheep’s clothing. Every single person has great worth, great beauty, great potential to love one another. But we must seek out how to love. What does it mean to love someone who is different than us? It means to speak up when the world has lost its mind and its heart. It means to be humbled and admit when we’ve been wrong or when we’ve been unable to understand. In order to love deeply, we must begin to understand where we have gone wrong and how we can do better. How can we understand what we have done if we never speak to those we have hurt with our silence or with our wrong words? God’s love is so much deeper than the surface love we often offer other people. Saying there is no problem simply means we can’t see the problem. It’s like closing our eyes in the midst of a tragedy and saying the commotion is nothing serious. To love our neighbor takes humility not condescension. To love our neighbor takes real conversation and real concern. Wherever you stand, don’t stand for hatred. Love, and learn what love means. We’re all learning together. Apart we fail.

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With The King Day 22

Dear Reader, 

Life takes time, but I often want my prayers answered in an instant. I’m learning that as years go by I’m learning more about God and understanding why He answers me in the way that He does and within the timelines He creates. Time gives way for reflection. It saturates our bones and it whispers wisdom and truth down into our souls. We rarely understand why things happen while we are still in the moment, but when we step away from it into a new season of life we find that things become more clear and we are able to see how God was simply fitting together all the missing pieces. We see things close up and out of focus, but He sees things and people in their entirety. He can’t give away the ending to us because then maybe we would never chose to live out the moments that get us there. Maybe we would miss out on all the beauty He weaves if we already had all the answers. I think of who I was five years ago and I know there are things in my life today that I simply could not accept back then. Five years ago there was no way I could be who I am now. I hadn’t lived it out yet. I hadn’t wrestled. I hadn’t reflected. I was looking at everything at face value, looking it all right in the eyes but couldn’t see anything from a different perspective. I know five years from now the same will hold true, that I wasn’t capable of being who I will be then while I’m standing where I am now. And so when we ask God why He is taking all the time in the world to answer our prayers, we must understand that it is because God works for Good and anything Good is worth all the time that God invests into it. There is reason and purpose and beauty to your story, but we must live to find it. We must walk through fire to experience true Grace. We must surrender to understand real freedom. And we must love deep to understand what God really means when He says He loves us. Prayer is the caption on the winding of time. It’s how we walked and talked with God as He lived out our stories with us. He is present and He is real and He is the time weaver and the Joy bringer and the Grace giver. Praise Him for all the time He has given us, and all the words He still has yet to say to us. 

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With the King Day 8

Dear Reader, 

Tonight was all about fireflies and sunsets and my lilies standing out against the darkening warm summer sky. The storm from last night left much work for today, but what I usually find is that after a day of working in the Lord’s creation comes an evening full of rest and contemplation. So many nights I have prayed for my storms to pass. I’ve prayed for Jesus to instantly and miraculously calm them. But when I ask for these things, I neglect to realize that God’s power is often seen gloriously on display in the midst of those storms and His peace is felt mercifully and graciously afterwards. There is an ebb and flow to this life. With a broken world comes broken prayers. But, Jesus knows what we mean and what we need behind each uttered word. He knows the best way to answer us. Prayer is about giving it all to God and watching Him bring Grace to every situation. There is power in the name of Jesus. We do not call on Him in vain. He answers each prayer in His perfect timing and with His perfect wisdom. Love is at the heart of all He does for us. Love for the Father, love for the world, and love for you. Tonight trust what He will do with your prayers. Give it all to Jesus and rest in His answer. Not everything is a clear cut yes or no. Deep down we know that to be true even in this physical world. There’s more to every answer, just like there is more behind every prayer we utter. There is a back story and a future up ahead. And God knows how to tie it all together beautifully. Trust Him, even with your storms. 

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With the King Day 5

Dear Reader, 

When I started this series, 40 Days of Prayer, I had it in my head that I was going to pray diligently for 40 days over one single thing to my Father God. But that one single thing is not as simple as the three words I chose to remember it by. That one single thing cannot stand on its own because it’s attached to a million other dreams, and people, and situations. Chances are, that one prayer you want answered isn’t a stand alone situation either. If God would just answer your one prayer, and ignore all the others, it would probably be true that what you would find yourself with wouldn’t be sufficient. God knows that. That’s why He tells us to pray without ceasing. Bring it all before Him. Bring everything before Him. Our prayers aren’t stand alone requests. Instead they are a continuous conversation thread with the King of Heaven who supplies ALL our needs. This is just one more reason that prayer can’t end up on my to-do list. To-do lists are meant for actions that can be accomplished and then crossed off. But prayer is continuous. We should never be done praying. Because God is never done responding to us. His love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on you. I encourage you today to go beyond simply reading off the prayer request list, and dive deeper into the real honest things we need to be discussing with our God. God is real. Our prayers should be too.

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

40 Days of Prayer: Conversations With the King Day 3

Dear Reader, 

The truth about prayer is that it doesn’t always make things easier. Sometimes when we come before God and we pour out our honest hearts and thoughts before Him, He still asks us to walk the hard road. I think tonight of Jesus who prayed that the cup would be taken from Him in the Garden of Gethsemane, if that be His Father’s will. We know that the will of His Father was that His Son continue walking out the hard path of our salvation. God loved His Son dearly, and yet He trusted Him to do the hardest thing in the world…lay down His life for His friends. Hard days that come our way aren’t always punishment and they aren’t always consequences. Sometimes they are God showing us that He can give us the strength to do hard things and walk hard roads because He is working our hard lives into a greater thing. He is weaving together the story of the world. He is healing brokenness and breaking down barriers and coming to us in our rawest forms. He who is the maker of your heart is also the lover of your soul and the provider of your strength. So if tonight when you come before Him in prayer, and He asks you to do the hard thing, know that He will provide what you need for the battle. He will walk by your side. He will give you more of His Spirit. Prayer doesn’t always take away the things in life we wish it would. But it helps us prepare for what’s ahead. What God speaks to us is truth, and sometimes truth is hard. But His hard truth comes with great love and great power. 

In Him, 

A Fellow Grace Wanderer 

Made In His Image: Infertility Awareness Week

As much as I’ve tried to begin to shy away from the hurt that infertility has brought into my life, God keeps leading me back to it and reminding me that during this battle His love for me has been made evident. I have proclaimed His name louder and I have knelt deeper in prayer. I have hurt, and I have heard His voice. I have cried, and He has comforted me. I have screamed out in anger and in frustration…and He has remained steady at my side. What has God taught me through infertility? He has taught me that He will never leave me or forsake me.

I will be honest that I didn’t know Infertility Awareness Week even existed. However, I’ve had a million thoughts running through my mind in the last month as I have tried to process everything that God brought me through in regards to infertility, and as I begin to process everything He will be faithful through as we enter into the adoption process.

There are two questions that I haven’t been able to answer until now. They were the two questions I was asked right in the middle of treatment, and right at the end as we decided to no longer pursue infertility treatments. They were this: “Why does this hurt you so much?” and “Will you ever be happy if it never happens?”

“Why does this hurt you so much”? was the question that most haunted me. It was asked by friends who already had children. It was asked by my family members. It was asked by people who barely knew me. And maybe their wording wasn’t all exactly the same, but the essence of the question still was. They couldn’t understand it. And honestly…I couldn’t either.

I thought for a long time that maybe I was selfish for wanting God to grow our family so much that it hurt. I thought I was asking for something that wasn’t meant for me. I felt slighted, and hurt, and marked by God as not good enough for this blessing that most would view as “common”. What hurt the most? Probably the thought of family Christmas when my husband and I grow old and there aren’t any grandchildren, or maybe the thought that I would never know that bond between mother and child as she carried her baby for nine months in her womb, or possibly when I realized there wouldn’t be any little ones running around who had both of our blue eyes and my brown hair with his curls. The hurt, I think, comes mostly when we realize that the buck stops here. That even though we love tradition and heritage so much, that with us it would be different. And I could not reconcile it with what God had laid out in the Bible for husbands and wives. He told Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply…why was He withholding this from me? Am I broken?

A couple of days ago God placed the book of Genesis on my heart. It’s a book I keep coming back to over and over again. This is the passage that has clung to me:

“So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female he created them” Genesis 1:27

And that’s it, friends. That’s why it hurts. Because God, who is our Father, is also our creator and we were made in His likeness. We contain attributes of the Father, and so naturally, just as it was His will to be our Father…it is our desire to follow suit, it is our desire to hold flesh of our flesh and bone of our bones and know that we are connected, that we are family.

God is all about His children. He created us. He gave us free will that we would choose to freely love Him…because that’s how family works, isn’t it? We can choose to stay connected, and we can choose to walk away. But it is the hope of every father and mother that our children would also choose to love us…as we have hoped to so dearly love them. God describes His church as a family, He describes us as sons and daughters, Jesus referred to Him as our Father. Why does infertility hurt so much? Because the desire to be a part of a family is intertwined into who we were created to be and in who God is to us.

And so it’s not just that my womb has never stretched to hold life…it’s that it feels like a part of me is entirely missing.

That’s not something that I was prepared to encounter in this life. It’s not something that’s preached about at church, the topic of “what if you can never have children?”. It’s not talked about in  high school or middle school… in fact the opposite is discussed, “how not to have children right now!”. And I don’t think you can ever hope to even comprehend the magnitude of it or the depths of your soul that it reaches, unless you yourself have felt its sting.

But…here’s the second question I was asked: “Do you think you could ever be happy if it never happens for you?” There was a period of time where I thought my answer might be no. I couldn’t understand what the purpose was in purchasing a house with three bedrooms and a yard for kids to play in if we would never give birth to children to fill those spaces. I couldn’t get over the fact that I had spent the majority of my life caring for children at local day cares, and church nurseries, and teaching piano lessons, and serving as a private nanny only to be met with the disappointment that I wouldn’t get to step into the leading role as Mama even though I felt so completely prepared.

“Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take up his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” Matthew 10:37-38

Through all of this hurt and disappointment, God has still given me purpose. Every child that I see now, I know that God specifically created and wanted. I see the looks on my friend’s faces as they parent their kids and I know how incredibly blessed they are and I marvel even deeper at the miracle of life. And I realize so much more now, that this life is not my own. It was redeemed at a cost. And that cost was the love of my Father. He must come first, even before my dreams of being a mama.

I prayed that God would bring me peace. I prayed that He would lift this burden from my shoulders and that one day…I would feel whole again. It’s been over three years, and friends, He is doing exactly that. There really is no explanation for what God is doing in my heart, or how my cloud has begun to lift and float away. It just has. Without warning, God has parted my clouds. He keeps speaking to me…it feels in softer tones now. I have felt the fire, and I pray that it has refined me. There was such a temptation to let it melt me instead…but I think now, God was holding me all along. Even as I kicked and screamed, because I’m His child.

We have begun the paperwork to pursue domestic adoption, and while that brings me so much Joy, I know the road ahead will still be hard as we begin to understand the depth and the grief that separation from one’s biological mama entails. The hurt that waits up ahead is not just my own anymore, it’s of my baby and of their mama. It seems that pain multiplies, and my heart breaks as I know that the pain in this world just keeps spreading. But…my God is a mender of broken hearts. And Joy can multiply too. Perhaps, He allowed my heart to be broken that I may weep with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice…that I  might better understand and know my baby who will come home to us one day and their mother who will forever hold the other half of this broken heart of mine.  I know the wait could be long for placement, I know that there is the possibility that we won’t be placed, and I know that God has used infertility to prepare me for that wait. I know what it feels like to wait for a long time…I know what it feels like to not know how this ends. And I know how good my Father God is, even if what I will and what I desire never comes to be. His love for me comes first.

My Joy has begun to emerge from a place in my heart that I didn’t know existed and that I don’t think would ever have been uncovered if I had never experienced infertility. So, could I ever be happy if none of this ever happens for me? The answer  is yes. I think that because of all of this my Joy will be felt at a greater magnitude. I think that without it I may have taken for granted all that God is and who He is and how He loves me…and how He loves His children. My Joy in Jesus is greater…I am happier in Him because of this. And that is my victory. That though I was met with pain, and though I felt as if I was broken…Jesus has restored my soul. He has replaced the weakness of my heart with strength. He has given me Hope.

To those of you who suffer in this, know that Jesus is greater. Know that prayer is not just uttered desperate words…but that it is fully heard by your Father. Know that tears of pain can become tears of Joy in Him, and that Joy is not dependent on whether or not we are physically healed or whether we are able to become parents…but instead is an unspeakable mystery in the glory of our God for which we can not explain but can proclaim. Joy in Jesus defeats the darkness…and that is full truth.

I have found His grace is all complete, He supplieth every need. While I sit and learn at Jesus feet, I am free, yes, free indeed.

I have found the pleasure I once craved, It is joy and peace within; What a wondrous blessing! I am saved from the awful gulf of sin.

I have found that hope so bright and clear, Living in the realm of grace; Oh, the Saviour’s presence is so near, I can see His smiling face.

I have found the joy no tongue can tell, How its waves of glory roll! It is like a great o’er flowing well, Springing up within in my soul.

It is joy unspeakable and full of glory, oh, the half has never yet been told.

B.E. Warren.

Does this mean I don’t have hard days? no. They still come once in a while. But it means that I’ve found my strength in Jesus, and that this battle no longer stands a chance at defeating me. Jesus is stronger. Jesus is better. Jesus heals hearts. Infertility can’t ever steal your purpose or your worth. It won’t distort you before the Father. It doesn’t mark you as lesser or forgotten. On the contrary…it marks you as brave. It marks you as strong. You, my friend, are a canvas for which the Lord God will paint beautiful things on. Your life can bloom in Him. And your heart can heal.


How Sweet the Sound of Grace: When the Joy of Jesus Defeats Your Battles

Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. James 5:7

Spring is in full force here in Wisconsin. I can see it bursting forth in the buds on the trees and in the little purple flowers peeking up above the ever growing blades of grass. The Sugar River has begun sweetly flowing again, and any sign of frozen ground has melted away. It seems too poetic to say that my heart is experiencing its own season of new life. The winter was hard, both on my soul and on my body. But God has begun placing sweet blossoms of hope on the hard places of my life and I’m seeing Him revive me in every sense of that word.

Revive. What emotion that word evokes for me! I know I keep talking about this same battle, but it’s the battle that has most tried to define me. Infertility…infertile…as in nothing will grow. And I believed that for a short while with all my heart…that nothing would or could grow from me. I sought doctors who prodded and tried to jump start my body, but nothing. I had placed my hope in needles and in x-rays and in hormone therapies and in procedures. And as sterile as those doctor’s offices felt…so did my heart.

I had wanted Jesus to bring about new life naturally. I hope that one day He will. But for now, I am experiencing a form of new life that I had not planned on. I feel as if something inside me has woken up. Some storehouse of Joy that I had left untapped. My husband and I are on a new adventure, and I had thought maybe that was what had made the difference. But I think it goes deeper than that.

It goes all the way down to the roots of my disappointments and to the ugliness of my dark days. As we come out of the season of Lent, the season of grieving both for our Savior and because of our sins, I have discovered that Jesus went right to the darkness I had reserved for myself. He broke down that door, and He entered with Life.

Joy has everything to do with Hope, and is based entirely on Grace. Infertility brought out the ugliest side of me I have ever seen. I was broken, shattered, fragile, and bitter. I cried more nights than I didn’t. I literally grieved for a life that never existed. And yet I kept pushing. Something would come of this. Something HAD to come from this. And so I preached Hope. I clung to Grace. Even in my ugliness I ran toward my Savior. I wasn’t sure how this battle would end….I just knew it would.

Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete. John 16:24

I am not pregnant…and yet I feel like this battle has been won. I can feel it in my soul. I walked blindly for over three years with the hope that infertility would fade away, and I grieved what I thought I had lost. I prayed God would heal my heart, even if He chose never to heal my body. I prayed that infertility wouldn’t become my idol…that it wouldn’t cover up who I am in Him.

I prayed those words, but I’m not sure that I actually expected to feel almost a physical weight being lifted up off of my shoulders. I told my women’s group a few months ago, that I actually felt like I was coming out the other side of this battle. A friend had sent me a message, concerned that I had lost the peace that passes all understanding. And just in that week before I read what she wrote, I had experienced that exactly. I do not understand how the bitterness of my soul was lifted. I can not explain why the depth of sadness in my heart has been healed. But it has continued on being healed, more and more so each day.


Next month is Mother’s Day. For three years that has been a day of sadness for me. I watched as mother’s in our churches were praised and how their children loved them. And I couldn’t understand why God would keep me from becoming a mother. I was broken as those around me became pregnant and as their families continued to grow.

But now…something has changed. I have been changed.

My life was never mine to plan out. God has shown me this so clearly. I belong to Him, every part of me does. And this is true whether we are aware of it or not. He is our creator, our Father, our maker. Our lives belong to Him. And we can go through this life kicking and screaming, complaining at every “wrong” turn, or we can surrender.

We can surrender to the beautiful sound of Grace in our lives. We can sit back and watch how God unfolds the moments of our life right before our eyes. Beautiful lives don’t come from plans and savings and working our days away. They come from the Giver of Life. They come when we loosen our grip on bitterness and disappointment and heartbreak. We so often hold onto to those things…and we don’t have to.

We may experience hard winters. We may feel them coming. We may see everything freeze around us. And yet…God will bring about Spring. He can melt what freezes in us. He can bring fresh sprigs of green from hearts that we thought couldn’t grow anything. You are not what you battle. You are who He says you are, His child, His beloved, His redeemed.

Joy won’t come with the fulfillment of our plans. It won’t come in the safety of our savings. Joy is found in Him alone.

Your life is found in Him alone. Until we turn our faces toward Him, we are simply wandering away. I used to worry that all this talk about prayer would simply be talk. That I would talk to God, and He would always for eternity tell me to wait. I was scared that I wouldn’t see an answer, that I wouldn’t feel a difference.

But I feel changed. And my circumstances haven’t changed. The only explanation is Jesus.

I find myself completely defined in this hymn, Amazing Grace. It is who I was and who I am and who I will become.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that Saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found, was blind but now I see.

The Lord has promised good to me; His Word my hope secures. He will my shield and portion be, as long as life endures.

Through many dangers, toils, and snares I have already come; ‘Tis grace has brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home.

When we’ve been there ten thousand years, bright shining as the sun, we’ve no less days to sing God’s praise than when we’d first begun.  – John Newton

Friend, if you have been praying that God would heal you, that He would mend your broken spirit, that He would revive your withered soul…know that He will. He is faithful. He who created the heavens and the earth, He who became like us and died a death that only we deserved, He who conquered death and who declared victory over our sins…He has not forgotten who you are. He won’t leave you alone in this.

I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands.

Isaiah 49: 15b-16a